Anonymous said: why dont you just break up with him?
Just because we’re going through a rough patch doesn’t mean I want to break up….
Well here’s a big rant on a stupid blog I never use because I don’t have any friends; I’ve sunken to this low low level
I never used to fight with my boyfriend up until about the 8th month. That’s when he stopped working because the restaurant he works at closed down to move locations. In his defense, all of the employees were told it would only be a month until the new place opened. So he thought, “Awesome. I have money stacked up, it’ll be a vacation.”. Oh how wrong he was.
Soon one month turned into three months and the new place still isn’t open and they don’t even seem to be working on it much lately. He ran out of money and so for the last two and a half months, I’ve been footing the bill. Paying for breakfasts, lunches, dinners, gas, trips to the state fair, buying clothes for the wedding we went to, bringing him home my comped meals from work so he doesn’t have to eat canned tuna at home, paying some of his cell phone bill, going grocery shopping and letting him pick stuff out to take home etc. I’ve been doing all of this because I love him, and I don’t want him to have to struggle to feel comfortable. And while I love him to death, this has all been really exhausting. Especially when I feel like I haven’t gotten much appreciation in return.
Sure there’s the “thanks baby” every so often and some “I love you” ,s thrown around here and there, but it just feels like those are just words you say to fill in a blank. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not doing this for some sort of ridiculous praise or asking him to build a Bailey shrine, but some sort of actions that show me he’s appreciative would be nice.
Every time I talk to him about this, he gets upset. He thinks all I want him to do is spend money on me and buy me things and take me places. And while yes, that would be nice, I know its not realistic at this point. He has been working for his dad and been saving up some money that way, but it’s only just enough to pay for rent and some bills. I don’t want him to spend a whole bunch of money on me. I have a job for the things I need, and for the things I want. I pay for my own stuff. But maybe a “Hey, let me pay for the cat food/littler/lunch/whatever this time” on something inexpensive we do/buy/eat would be really nice.
We never had problems until money started being a problem. It really upsets me that the underlying cause for 80% of our arguments is money. I don’t want to be THAT couple. I just want the new restaurant to open already so we can get on with our lives and forget about this part of the relationship we’re struggling with :/
If you’ve ever doubted yourself, walk deep into any forest. Notice how the trees still stand even though they are given no recognition. Walk along any stream. The water still flows, though no one stops to praise it. Watch the stars late at night; they shine without acknowledgment. Humans are just the same. We are made out of the same elements as these beautiful wonders. Always remember your beauty and self worth.